Skip to main content

26. Don't pity for someone who is single

Old quote says "Everybody needs somebody". Or: "there is someone for anyone."

I would not agree with this. There are many single people in this world, which means there is no match for everyone. It is not because nobody wants them, it is because of some circumstances and their choices.

There is stereotype that single people are unhappy . But, are all people in relations and marriage happy?

Let't talk about relations on distance, relations where one partner cheats, and marriage from financial interests. Somehow, it doesn't sound happy, isn't it?

There is a big difference between someone we want and what we get. Life gives us cards, but we are playing. And when we do wrong steps in wrong time, results are not on our expectations.

I know guy who spent his youth on parties asking for a right girl. Mostly he was drunk and life pass over him. Now he has diabetes and he needs someone to take care for him. Also he lives in village and it is hard to approach to him, he is surrounded by animals and they are his best friends. When his friend asked him how he feel because he has no life partner, he said that he is rather alone than in bad marriage. 
Single people are indeed proud, and if you try to find perfect match for them, be careful not to hurt their dignity. 

This is like you offer pieces to someone who wants whole cake. Single people are often underestimated as someone from recycle bin.

What are biggest mistakes when you try to help someone who is single?

1. try to introduce your ex partner, as someone who was not good for you, but it will be good for your single friend
2. your ugly cousin who never had girlfriend
3. your admirer, you rejected him and try to get rid of him
4. your good friend, he is so dear but lonely, maybe he can match 
5. blind date with new guy from your workplace

If you try to help single person, ask about her/his priorities and preferences. Try to enter in their head. Focus on areas that person like. If they like nightclubs, invite them for a party, not in theater. Let that meeting be as something what happened with destiny, not by your assistance. It will look more natural and you will not hurt dignity of your friend.

Imagine yourself on this place, what you would not like, that someone feels sorry for you. Indeed single persons have freedom and space. Treat them with respect, not with condolence, because nobody dies.
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Women are not weak as they look

Where is a fight, there is love. Since childhood opposite genders tease each other, make conflicts and argue, just to compare their mental strength. Men are strong gender by nature, but many of them underestimate woman’s will and character. Some judgments define a woman as fragile, sensitive creature, and the man who is educated in the traditional family will often underestimate a woman. He will see the weak creature in the corner with a face full of tears. Well, a woman can defend herself in thousand ways. She will seduce you to obey you. She will pretend weakness just to take revenge on you if you humiliate her. Be ready for her trick as on poker table. Especially men who are used to silent, obedient woman can’t count on such resistance. Remember, the woman is the one who is working and clean house after work, carry for kids and for your laundry and your meal. Women are multi-tasking, so how can they be weak? When you fall in love with a woman who can care for herself, she doesn’t …

Are you the hunter or the kill?

Criticism is a sensitive field. It is easy to give critics, to mock someone, but it is not easy to receive this in return and to make a joke by yourself. Do you laugh at yourself, in public? Do you allow friends to tease you, even this means that they will overrate your faults and make your values smaller? There is a thin line between social clown and person who loves to make jokes about yourself. If you are a hunter, if you respect yourself, you will allow the certain dose of criticism but you will not be a doormat. If you ask me to whom you must be grateful, maybe my answer will surprise you. Yes, i am grateful to my parents because they give me motivation, strong will, and attitude. I am grateful to my sister because she stood on my side when i felt miserable. I am grateful to my husband for accepting me as i am, even when i was the worst nightmare. Mostly, i am grateful to my rivals, to develop my strength. As i passed my initiation, faced with many troubles and get out from bigg…

Are you grateful for the things you have ?

Are you grateful for the things you have in your life? I don’t think about furniture or new plates, i think about your private and professional life. Sometimes, we forget to save gratitude in our heart because our mind is too busy by dreaming about something we still did not realize. Gradation looks like this: I don’t have boyfriend. I have boyfriend but we are not married. We are married but we don’t have kids. We have only one child. Our kid is not obedient, we have problematic teenager.
In professional plan, we can use same pattern: I am studying and i don’t have job. I have job but my salary is small. I have good salary but i have no free time. I have job but my boss is dictator. It is about human nature, where all are rivals, competitors and opponents. Why your neighbor owe expensive car, and you are going at work with bus? Why your kids can’t have designers clothes? Why your friend has bigger flat then you? We are dreaming because of our ambitions. It is not bad, i am also ambiti…