26. Don't pity for someone who is single




Old quote says "Everybody needs somebody". Or: "there is someone for anyone."

I would not agree with this. There are many single people in this world, which means there is no match for everyone. It is not because nobody wants them, it is because of some circumstances and their choices.

There is stereotype that single people are unhappy . But, are all people in relations and marriage happy?

Let't talk about relations on distance, relations where one partner cheats, and marriage from financial interests. Somehow, it doesn't sound happy, isn't it?

There is a big difference between someone we want and what we get. Life gives us cards, but we are playing. And when we do wrong steps in wrong time, results are not on our expectations.

I know guy who spent his youth on parties asking for a right girl. Mostly he was drunk and life pass over him. Now he has diabetes and he needs someone to take care for him. Also he lives in village and it is hard to approach to him, he is surrounded by animals and they are his best friends. When his friend asked him how he feel because he has no life partner, he said that he is rather alone than in bad marriage. 
Single people are indeed proud, and if you try to find perfect match for them, be careful not to hurt their dignity. 

This is like you offer pieces to someone who wants whole cake. Single people are often underestimated as someone from recycle bin.



What are biggest mistakes when you try to help someone who is single?

1. try to introduce your ex partner, as someone who was not good for you, but it will be good for your single friend
2. your ugly cousin who never had girlfriend
3. your admirer, you rejected him and try to get rid of him
4. your good friend, he is so dear but lonely, maybe he can match 
5. blind date with new guy from your workplace

If you try to help single person, ask about her/his priorities and preferences. Try to enter in their head. Focus on areas that person like. If they like nightclubs, invite them for a party, not in theater. Let that meeting be as something what happened with destiny, not by your assistance. It will look more natural and you will not hurt dignity of your friend.

Imagine yourself on this place, what you would not like, that someone feels sorry for you. Indeed single persons have freedom and space. Treat them with respect, not with condolence, because nobody dies.
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