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256. Pieces of your heart

The space between former and new relation is space for questions. What i need, what i wish and what i expect? Result of expectation can lead into disappointment, so as much we wish miracle, it will not happen always. New love will not heal scarves from previous relations if we are doing the same mistakes. If you had six relations during 10 years, and if all broke, problem is not in partners, problem is inside of you.

Love is as your favorite meal. Don't eat if you are not hungry. If you are half hungry, don't eat too. Wait to empty your stomach or in this case, wait for empty space in your heart. When you don't have patience to wait right opportunity or you simply can't handle loneliness, love remains will be in the air as viruses. Your ex lover will stay in your fantasies, until you hold hand of your present lover.

Patricia was big fan of wild guys, she was addicted to drama and all her love stories were measured with big amount of pain. On some way, she enjoyed to cry and suffer, because also grief is deep feeling which shake her inside, as storm. The only thing she never liked was boredom. After relations with Max and Gareth, her next target was Joseph. He was different from her usual pattern, he never had car accident and in fact every mother would like to invite him on family dinner. Patricia wanted to get rest from excitements after Gareth suddenly abandoned her.

One day she went into club with Joseph and there was Gareth. He was alone, smoking, and her eyes were all the time on Patricia. He did not want to date with her again, but he wanted to spoil her new relation, because it was challenge. Patricia returned him significant eye blink, and they were staring to each other like Joseph was not there. He asked her who is that guy.

- Oh yes i heard about him. So leather jacket you bought me, isn't it similar as on Gareth? You wanted that i stop shave my beard for few days, so suppose you wanted to make me as his twin brother?

Patricia wanted to make him calm, but half hour later Max entered into club with his new girlfriend. They exchanged greetings and Joseph was more mad.

- So why don't you open party for your former boyfriends? You can invite me too, because for few days i will be your ex too.

Patricia was not ready for new relation. Even worse, she wanted to change Joseph, to create new wild guy from him. It was kick on his personality. Love remains were in the air and Patricia was almost drunk from ex sparks.

It was not fair to Joseph at all, because she did not get over her past adventures. She wanted to show him her world, but he was not ready to enter there. It was no place for his personality. He was too boring, he never kicked someone's ass and vulgar word was not part of his dictionary.

Blank zone is the worst period between two relations

We must empty our heart and soul. If you are half empty, you are in danger to interfere with dangerous ingredients. It is like mix of two drinks, salt and sugar. The best solution is isolation and abstinence. Maybe you think that new love will heal your heart from old love ? That is not true if you did not get over it by yourself. Only you can decide when is over. Breakup doesn't mean that this love ended in your fantasies. He is still walking there, let him walk until you get tired of his ghost. 

The worst thing is to compare your present partner with ex partners, to give him reason to compete. It is not grateful to participate in this race. Fight with ghosts is unfair battle. This ghost is not guilty, and your present partner can't blame your ex because he is not in your life anymore. You need to let him go, because he went away in previous chapter.
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