309. Tick tock fantasies






If we compare reality and our fantasies, tastes are different. Reality often leaves bitter taste in our mouth, like we swallowed fish oil. Fantasies are cream on the cake, that sugar dose which will make our life more magical. If you have habit to live in fantasies, you can't look into eyes of your reality. It is too much painfull, cruel or simply you feel empty? Take a nap and call your fantasies in your dreams, but don't sleep forever otherwise you will have nightmares.

Doris always get late from her office work. Sometimes she works overtime, that is private company and her boss is unpredictable. If they don't sell some products on time, she will stay even for weekends. After work she must go in the shopping mall. Her husband is also busy and tired so Doris will buy grosseries for dinner. That Tuesday was especially bad day. Doris got complaints from her clients, her boss was yelling on her and it was terrible crowd on the road. Finally, she went into mall and there was big line, one old woman made mess because she forgot her wallet. Doris wanted to destroy all around herself, but all she could do was deep sigh. 

Recently she opened her profile on one social network. It was her escape from reality. When her husband Paul started to snore, her only comfort was to stay awake in the middle of the night. There she met Gerard, man from France. They were immediately connected , as virtual lovers. Doris had virtual affair, and she did not feel guilt. After all, Paul was not interested for sex for a week, he was constantly tired and Doris wanted passionable moments. Gerard and Doris exchanged erotic messages. She opened herself to him, and he trusted her to talk about his life. His fiance died from cancer before two years, and accord his story he had terrible shock and he could not make love with any woman, because he had feeling that he is cheating. Doris was sexy woman and her photos attracted Gerard, especially her breasts, always in tight shirts. That captured his atention, and he felt excited and horny. After some time Doris noticed that he talks with her only in messages. He was his friend at her page, but when she opened statuses, Gerard was numb. Also, he was very talkative with other women. Gerard explained to Doris, he can't talk with her public, because he is ashamed of his dirty messages to her. He imagined her lips with his penis in mouth. Even he asked her permission to masturbate on her photos. Doris was unpleasently suprised, especially when they had very hot chat, and after that Gerard talked with one woman on his status and called her lady. "So what is me?" Doris asked him, and he said " I think that you like sex, i can see in your eyes."

Doris did not want to participate in this fantasy anymore. Suddenly, even her husband was more atractive than Gerard. At least, Paul respected Doris and he was proud on her, she was indeed ambitious lady and very educated. In this moment, Doris felt very low and dirty. Gerard has many virtual women as friends, some were ugly and old, others were in cheap clothes, but he respected all and he spent all day to talk with them. When Doris appeared, he was numb and silent. So she wrote to him polite message to leave her alone. It was as business letter "our cooperation is over, go to shrink." In some symbolic sense, Doris was bottle with pills, Gerard needed her to feel alive, but he could not respect her. He separated two things, his passion and respect and finally result was negative.

Fantasies are as white clouds, they look amazing until the storm. 

Then they will change color into grey and black. The same is with our imagination. One step too far and our dream is now nightmare. You were dreaming, but you fall from your bed and hit straight into your head. Ouch, that hurts. How can you be so stupid? You allow someone to tresspass into your privacy. That hot stranger is owner of your black side, your expression of secret desires now are his property. 

The good thing about fantasies is that we can use them as reminder

You did not value what you had, so someone will remind you that it can be even worse. Maybe your reality is not Hollywood, but don't want to swim in dirty water. This is risk which you take when you step into dark zone. Unknown area is maybe danger zone. This hot stranger doesn't hold flower in his hands. He holds a bomb, which will explode every minute, together with your honor and reputation.
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