438. Kissing a fool

Be good and nice person and people will return you goodness on the same way. Bullshit, because you need to know well human nature before you give your heart to someone. There is a limit between fool and good person with attitude. This area is very sensitive and only few steps can take you into abyss, to lose your personality because your are victim of someone's ego.

How can you know that person is using your goodness?

Person never say thanks. You do everything for her, but this is understandable accord her opinion.

Person never have time for you if you need favor.

Person always compare her problems with yours, and of course, your problems are less relevant.

Person will get insulted if you reject her. She will not talk with you, because once you said no.

Love is especially fragile area in trade of goodness. You are not objective, and you will think that your partner deserve moon and stars, even space ship, because he is with you. Love is blind because often we do things for someone and we forget that in this process we could lose ourselves. We live for other persons and their needs.

Sharon was madly in love in Nick. He was expert in manipulation, so when Sharon did not listen him, he would tell her that he will leave her. Also he was very depressed, and sometimes he threat her with suicide. "I will cut my wrist. " It was legendary sentence from Nick's mouth. He was flirting, and when Sharon complaint on this, he said that she is jealous , and she apologize to him, because she felt as jealous bitch. After their relation broke, Sharon still felt obligated to help Nick, especially when his mother died. She was at funeral, instead of new girlfriend Carol, who was on business journey. When Carol got back from journey, Nick waited her in airport with flowers, they went into fancy restaurant and Sharon felt as idiot. Nick never said thanks to Sharon, because she was there for him in his moments of grief.

What people often mix is strong attitude and bitchy image. 

Person who will use word no is not a bitch. Bitch will not make favors to anyone, because ego rules with bitch. Strong person will make good deeds, but for those who deserve this. Here is a legend about man and snake. Man saved life of snake, and after few months snake deadly bite him. When he was dying, he asked why, and snake replied : "Because i am a snake." The same is with human nature, some people are not worthy of sacrifice. Also, some people can spit on you because you helped them, as when husband beats his wife, and hero neighbor came to help her and hit her husband. 

How to protect yourself from people who wish to use you?

Say no from time to time. Close door in front of others, because you have no time or you are not in the mood.

Say maybe before you obligate yourself to help someone. You will get on time.

Say "Sorry, i can't do this because this is against my beliefs". You can use appeal of conscience, and if your friend is real friend, he will understand.

Ask your friend a favor, to check will he jump for you, as you did the same for him.

Some people are afraid of to lose friends, if they are not always on service. Ask yourself, for what you are here, and are you really just friend in need? Also, people will easy label others as bad guys or bitches, just because once you rejected someone. If you use word no, you will find out who are your real friends, and who are just rats. It is very painful if you turn around and you realize that some people never did nothing for you and that they would leave a long time ago, just they are here to use you.

When your partner use you as your doll, he is kissing a fool. If you obey all the time, this is not even sexy. Sparks of goodness are never so bright as sparks of personality.

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