Another busy day , sleepless night and nervous morning. Week is full of obligations , our time is limited and in this race we will always lose. What to do to avoid feeling that we live in the same day again and again?
Today i talked with my colleague and she said that she works and eats and sleeps. Is that meaning of life, it sounds as draft story, where is no surprises and unexpected events, because we know exactly what will happen next day . She felt kind of rebellion and took her dog into walking, just to change daily schedule.
I don't know about you, but my life is full of surprises. I work on rebellion and i don't want to stuck in the same day. I would be terrified for my memory, because all this people, things and events would not have order in my mind. So i chose parties as way to make my life more interesting. When i say party, i will not talk just about clubs and loud music, i look at this more wide. Everything what is out of matrix is source of my joy. Trip in nature. Watching movie in cinema. Gambling in casino. Travelling in unknown destination with my husband. That is party time.
For sure you know about some people who never have fun. They are bonded by invisible chains and indeed they never breathe. They live in future in negative sense. It looks like this : "I will late on meeting. My mother will be angry because i forgot to buy her flowers. My client will hate me cause i did not solve his file on time. My daughter will cry because i did not find her doll. " Well, i understand, all these things are important, but did you think about yourself in the moment of desperation?
Last weekend i had party with partybreaker. This guy is my husband's friend X and indeed he was funny, charming and joyful guy until he got married and became a father. He made the best parties in his house while he was teenager. He was party boy, now he is only grumpy boy. So, during our party night in one Croatian night club it was usual crowd, lack of space and many young people. Nothing special to make you angry, unless lady with roses who was very pushy to sell her flowers and made me hasty, that i pushed her to teach her lesson. Granny taught her lesson and apologize to me, but our friend X was more and more grumpy . He started to spread poison from his mouth and said : "We are too old for this, we could be parents in this party and take our kids home. We could be policemen in control. " I said to him : "Relax, your wife is not here. " After half hour X went out from party and leave me and my husband to have fun without him.
He made me thinking, but not because of his words. He made me thinking because of his behavior. Are we all the same? He did not show respect toward us who invited him into this party night. Also, he did not respect our view and life style. If he sees himself as grumpy father and old husband, it doesn't mean that we must follow his example. He did not break our party, but he broke our trust. He did not make me feel old, because the day when i will feel old will be the day when will i die. He made me feel pity for him.
At the beginning of this story i mentioned my work colleague. Women is much older than X but i admire her spirit because she always have good stories. He is very busy but she likes to remember her relaxing days. When Croatia played football match with Spain, during Euro championship 2014, we both late at work because night before was big football time. We met at work without watching a clock, and all what we said was : "We lost match. So pity. " We did not say that we are too old to be so immature . Indeed, nobody noticed that day that we got late. Even my boss was tired.
If we stick on daily schedule, if we never step out from rules, we will die before our death. Routine is a killer, so cold blooded killer that we will not feel any stab. We might just collapse and fail. This party will be over because we let this to finish.