689. Exclusivity - right key for serious relation
When you will know that relation is getting serious? That moment is here when your partner want to make commitment. This kind of obligation doesn’t have to be engagement or marriage, it is simply exclusivity. He said he wants to date only with you, he is interested only for you and other women have no chance to get close with him.
Problem with immature guys is in their wrong perception. When your partner is immature, he thinks that is enough to say sweet words and make excuses or promises , so things will work out. That will pass with insecure women, but when woman is made of strong principles, such vision will fail.
Let’s assume that you are dating with playboy. He is in contact with many women. They write messages to him on his social page. They are calling him. When you are in club , restaurant or anywhere else with him, you will always meet his “friends. ” Title “friends” is secret code for lovers, former girlfriends or undefined adventures. Now, you ask him to clean his mess, but what if he says no?
Normally, you would say, leave him. Situation is not always simple, so if you come to phase when you fall in love in him and you are sad without him, he will use this to manipulate with you.
Where is an exit?
You can be friend with him. Say him, you are friend zoned, until you make decision.
You can give up, because there are lot of fishes in the sea.
Also, you might give him some time. Expiration date next month, next week, for his decision.
You can also have joker in pocket. Tell him, you are dating with someone else and you wait his hint. Make yourself as busy target, you are not taken, but also you will not be free because as every good product, you have your buyers. He is not the only one who wants you.
Now, you did your part, you are waiting him to call you. Don’t call him first, don’t make him rush, because this is as in stock market, your value is decreasing if you force situation. If this pending time takes too long, if he is silent, you got your answer. Sometimes, silence is for men the best conversation with woman.
Some guys said these things:
“I did not call her because i did not want to hear her crying or screaming. I was not interested. “
“My ex called me that she wants reunion, so i did not call that girl, i wanted to avoid trouble. “
“I felt i was not ready to commit to one woman. My friends called me on party, it was not time for romance. “
Even some women will say “let him, he will come back at the end”, that is not true. You can’t let guy who is in relation with you to do what he wants with other women. This is humiliation, and if you let him to flirt, next time he will ask you for advice what to do with certain woman. Friend zone can be painful if you love him.
Exclusivity means that :
He respects your opinion. He ask you advices, because you are important to him.
He will not make interactions with other women on a way to hurt you.
He will be loyal to you.
He will not let his friends to try with you. You are his target, he will not share you with other men.
Many women will swallow pride just to have man for adventure, for few nights, when they see, there is no chance to keep him. That is just bullshit solution. Scarves in your soul is not easy to heal. If you ask relation and he ask only flirt, make things clear. You will stay hungry as someone who ordered meal and got only soup on the table.