Life brings us to every kind of problem, but it is easier to deal with them when we are healthy. In the case when a person became an invalid, things are getting harder.
Everything we do until now changes.
Things have a different meaning, different shape and world is a harder place. But what is really necessary to do when a person got sick, in the case of invalidity or any trouble which makes life harder?
The worst thing we can do is sorrow, to treat that person as a little child. Here are examples of how people wanted to save dignity in the first place. They wanted to be treated like others.
1. Peter uses a wheelchair. He is a passionate gambler, and he spent almost every day in the casino. First other players looked at him with mercy, but then they accepted him as one of them. He uses his wheelchair alone, he doesn't allow any help and even he have big luck in slot machines. This passion means to him much more than tears, crying or prayers. Here, in casino Peter feels that he is still alive.
2. Joan had cancer in the uterus, first degree. Her family gathered around her and she saw all relatives, some people she did not see for years. They talked about death, sickness, they gave her advice and support, they talked about other examples and tragedies. Joan wanted to send them all to hell. When her daughter came at the weekend from another city, Joan asked her about ironing. Joan was ironing her underwear and she was so happy that she can be still useful. Joan is still alive thanks to surgery and x-rays. Her family members treat her now like nothing happened. They learned a lesson.
3. Steve is blind, he has a cane and he is working 4 hours a telephone, for one company. When he finished work, he must cross the street. There are big traffic and a lot of fast cars. But Steve doesn't allow anybody to help him. He learned to live in the dark and he is crossing road alone. Only in free time, he has a dog, and he will accept only help from his dog.
4. It was an important football match, on the square was a big Ecran and everyone wanted to see that. Thomas was in a wheelchair. A young couple bought a beer for him. Thomas said thanks to the young couple, they were really nice. For half an hour, Thomas used his wheelchair to move into the crowd, he caught the waitress and asked her to bring more beer to his friends. They accepted and make a toast for Thomas and for the football team. Thomas felt like he is young again.
When life brings us troubles, we can't allow defeat. The worst thing we can do is to bury our closest family members or friend before they die. We must give them a reason to live, and that reason is not sorrow, we can't treat them like they are less worthy. Depression is a silent killer, and if you treat someone as a helpless creature, that person will fall down. He/she will be angry and sad, because of your treatment.
Show them that the sun is still shining. Maybe in a different way than before, but life must go on.