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Who is testing your patience?





Someone is upsetting us and we don't know what to do. It is not hard to predict our reactions when anger becomes a master of our minds. Breath easy, calm down, try not to tremble, all that voices in our head are screaming for survival. 

We must eliminate the causer of our anger. This person jumps on our nerves and patience is over.


Our choice is between three ways of approach:


1. aggressive approach
2. passive approach
3. assertive approach


Brian was a new neighbor. He was a heavy metal fan and he had an electric guitar. Unfortunately, he chose his flat to improve his skills in playing the guitar. One day three men discussed his noise and each of them offered a different solution to this problem.


Dan said: "I have no nerves. I will ring on his door and when he appears I will kick his ass. I will break his bones and he will not be able even to hold that guitar anymore."



Timothy said: "I will pretend that nothing happened. It can't be noise all the time. He will get tired and stop by himself."



Patrick said: "I will warn him once. The second time I will call the police because I don't like to repeat myself."


In the end, Brian became silent and soon he will move to another apartment. He did not talk with Dan and Timothy, but he said goodbye to Patrick when he packed his things. 




Whatever problem was, we must focus on one solution. Stand firmly behind our attitude, to persuade a person what you really want. If you don't tell someone what is bothering you, a person can't read minds. If your threat, a person will think that you are lunatic and also you can have fights and injuries because you never know how strong is your opponent. Don't change your opinion later, this will create a mess. If you slap someone don't say I am sorry. If you use a kind approach, don't regret because you did not use fists. "I should do something" is a sign of guilty and a missed chance. 


The best way is assertive. 

You are cold minded, you know what you want and any way you choose the polite way to explain what is bothering you. After if it will not work out, you might decide for aggression or to ask for the help of someone who has violent skills. Use diplomacy to protect yourself and act in gloves when you need to. Your rival will be got a lesson and your hands will stay clean.

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